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National Missing Children's Day

05/24/2013

Jordan Tarr

Six year old Etan Patz was sent to school May 25, 1979 – and was never seen again. After 22 years of searching for the missing boy, he was legally declared dead in 2001. In November of 2012 Pedro Hernandez was formally charged with Patz's kidnaping and murder. This horrific incident happens all too often to children around the world. According to the U.S. Department of Justice, in the United States alone there are an average of 2,185 children reported missing every year.

The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children hosts “National Missing Children’s Day” on May 25 each year, in remembrance of Etan and children alike. This day was first observed in 1983 after a proclamation by President Ronald Regan. It is the hope of NCMEC that this day will raise the awareness about the threat of child abduction, and enlighten families on how to keep their children safe. The NCMEC encourages parents, guardians, and teachers to “Take 25” – a time in which adults take at least 25 minutes on this day to discuss with children the importance of safety. This nationwide observance is also a way in which we can support and comfort the families of these victims.   

In the case of international adoption, MLJ places the safety of a child at the top of our list. It is our mission to provide adoption services to prospective adoptive parents in light of the best interests of the child and in an ethical and legal manner. As a Hague Approved agency, it is not only our goal, but our duty "to take measures to ensure that inter country adoptions are made in the best interests of the child and with respect for his or her fundamental rights, and to prevent the abduction, the sale of, or traffic in children."

Though not all abductions end in happily ever after,  hope remains. As was the case for three young women who had been missing for 10 years - they were found alive and in fair condition at a home in Cleveland, Ohio. One victim's cousin shared her insight to a mother's intuition:  "she could feel it, a link a mom can feel, but she always believed Gina was alive and well." So great to hear these women are healthy, and reunited with their families!

We hope that on Satuday, May 25th you can take a bit of time out of the day to talk your children about good safety habits. Take 25, with a focus on prevention, offers resources and saftey tips that you can share with your children. 

Photo Credit: Wikipedia
For more information about MLJ Adoptions' international adoption programs, please click here.

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Photo Of The Week

05/24/2013

Photo used with permission.
If you would like your child to be featured in our Photo Of The Week, please email Shireen@mljadoptions.com. 

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Bill Klein and Jennifer Arnold's Special Needs Adoption

05/23/2013

Sonja Brown, MA

All countries have children waiting to be adopted and in need of loving families. The sad reality is that many children who are considered special needs will never be placed with a family of their own. While the adoption community celebrates all families wishing to expand their families through international adoption of a child in need, those families who choose specifically to adopt a special needs child hold a special place in our hearts.

My own faith in humanity was brightened when I learned Bill Klein and Jennifer Arnold, stars of TLC’s reality show “The Little Couple” reportedly just completed a special needs adoption from China, adopting a little boy considered a special needs child due to dwarfism. Their newly adopted son, three year old Will, was abandoned at birth and had little hope due to his special needs of ever being matched with a family. Enter Bill and Jennifer.
 
After Jennifer was told that pregnancy for her could be lethal, due to issues stemming from dwarfism, and after their surrogate suffered a miscarriage, the couple sought out international adoption of a special needs child in China and were matched with Will last fall and traveled in March to meet their child. Jennifer and Bill expressed an immediate connection to Will.

The term “special needs” encompasses a wide range of issues and not always necessarily physical or mental impairments. Some children are considered special needs because they are considered hard to place for reasons such as their age or they are in a sibling group that cannot be separated. Many special needs are considered minor and easily correctable, especially once the child arrives in the United States where they can receive proper and advanced medical care. With Will’s adoption by Jennifer, a physician practicing at a Houston children’s hospital, and Bill, Will will receive medical care that would not have been provided to him in China, not to mention the love and care of a forever family.

Homeland Security’s reports of international adoptions have shown a dramatic decrease in the number of international adoptions finalized by year and they are the lowest they have been In the last 15 years. Since 2007 adoptions have dramatically decreased from 19,000+ in 2007 to 11,000+ in 2011. This decrease has been caused by many factors both political and social and both domestically and internationally as well as the implementation of Hague Adoption Convention. The devastating effect of this reality is even worse for special needs children. Changing the climate of international adoption is imperative, especially for children who are hard to place. 

We celebrate Bill and Jennifer’s choice to pursue the adoption of a special needs child, but there are still many more children still in need of a forever family, especially children considered hard to place or having special needs.
Can we really look into the eyes of these children and tell them hope is dwindling?  

If you are interested in a special needs adoption please contact our special needs coordinator, Amy Moore at amy@mljadoptions.com.
Screenshot from People.com
 

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Family Spotlight: The Schuler Family

05/22/2013

Shireen R. Dadkhah

We're so proud of and thankful for each and every one of our families, we're giving them the chance to show off a bit. Each month we'll be shining the spotlight on one family by letting them introduce themselves and tell us a little about why and how they got involved with adoption.
 
This month we're letting the Schuler Family tell their story.
 
Introduce your family: 
We are Andre, Amy, Ava, and Tyson Schuler from Indiana.
 
What led you to adoption and international adoption?
Adoption has always been a part of our lives through both immediate and extended family members, and we became interested in international adoption – specifically Africa – through our time spent volunteering and working oversees. It was on both of our hearts to expand our family through adoption.
 
What country did you choose to adopt from and why did you choose that country?
A few years back we spent ten weeks working in East Africa at a hospital and orphanage. We were so moved by the experience that we stopped passively contemplating adoption and began actively seeking out information and opportunities. After learning of the overwhelming social and political situation that so many children in Congo find themselves faced with, we just knew that it was the right place and the right time and the right way for our family to grow. It just felt right.
 
Why did you choose to work with MLJ through your international adoption process?
As our church was starting their adoption ministry there was an opportunity to attend an adoption seminar led by a member of the MLJ staff. We attended and appreciated their passion for children and personal approach. After meeting with the program director we felt confident that MLJ was the right fit for us and the right agency to move forward with.
 
How long did the adoption take you?
Our entire process took approximately twelve months. We received our referral for our daughter five months after signing our initial contract and our daughter was home seven months later!
 
How has international adoption been different than you expected?
We didn’t really know what to expect when we started the international adoption process, but through it all we grew closer as a couple, and eventually as a family. It added a whole new meaning of love to our lives!
 
How has international adoption impacted your family?
International adoption has given us the opportunity to share our story with family, friends, co-workers, and complete strangers while checking out at Target. It’s a story about love, God, hope, patience, struggle, togetherness, and family. It’s about how our family is just like everybody else’s and at the same time like nobody else’s.
 
What was adjustment like for your family?
Overall our adjustment was wonderful! In a broad sense our adjustment was similar to that of any first-time parents, with the focus on sleep schedules, feedings, soothing, etc. It was also different in that when Ava came home she was seven months old. She had likes, dislikes, and definitely her own personality! So it took some time to get to know her as a little person. Later, it became an adjustment because of the outward appearance of our family, and the added attention we were getting when in public. 
 
What do you wish you could tell other families that are adopting or considering international adoption?
If it is in your heart to adopt please take that first step, you will never look back. Yes, it will be difficult. Yes, there will be lots of paperwork. Yes, it will take a lot of time. Yes, at times you will feel overwhelmed. But then it happens and your family is finally together, and all those things that once seemed to matter so much are quickly forgotten. It is definitely a rollercoaster ride filled with many ups and downs. But unlike any other rollercoaster ride, trust us when we say it ends with a very big “up.”  
 
Is there a special story about your adoption that you would like to share?
We sent a special care package to our daughter while she was still in Congo with a few shirts, pictures, and toys. A few months later we received a picture of our daughter and in it she was wearing one of the shirts we sent! Not one with bright colors or flowers or animals. Instead it was the one we picked out with an ironic twist. A simple shirt with one word: “Homegrown.”  

Photo used with permission.
For more information about MLJ Adoptions' international adoption programs, please click here. If you would like to be featured in our Family Spotlight please email Shireen@mljadoptions.com.

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Join Us For A Samoan Luau!

05/21/2013

Shireen R. Dadkhah

We are excited to announce that on Sunday, June 23rd we will be hosting a Samoan Luau! This is a fun and easy opportunity for families to connect with other families who have adopted or will be adopting from Samoa, to stay active in the adoption network, and to learn more about the Samoan culture. We invite you to bring the whole family and help us celebrate Samoa!

When: Sunday, June 23rd

Where: MLJ Adoptions
              617 E. North Street
              Indianapolis, IN 46204

Time: 2:00 -5:00

Food: MLJ will provide drinks and snacks. Please feel free to bring a snack to share. Families are also volunteering to attempt traditional, native dishes for taste testing. Margie Snyder is organizing these dishes and putting together recipe cards to take home. Please email Brooke@mljadoptions.com to connect you with Margie if you would like to volunteer to prepare a Samoan dish to share.

Activities:  

  • Photographer and photo station to provide digital family photo keepsakes for all attendees. 
  • Fire dancer Molly Wyldfyre
  • Hand drawn temporary Tatau and other designs.
  • Rugby drills with Indiana Ruby. 
  • Siapo bark and Lei crafts. We are in need of brown paper grocery bags for these crafts. Please contact Brooke@mljadoptions.com to donate or to volunteer to prep crafts. 

And much, much more!

On Friday and Saturday we will offer classes and seminars to help answer prospective clients questions, fulfill education courses, and to learn more about Samoan culture. Please RSVP to each specific class or seminar you plan to attend.

Friday

Home Study 101 - 12:00 - 1:00

Traveling to Samoa - 1:15 - 2:45

Affording Adoption - 1:15 - 2:45

Initial Adoption Info - 3:00 - 5:00

First Generation film screening - 6:30 - 8:30 


Saturday

Child Development and Adoption - 9:00 - 11:00

Creating A Lifebook - 11:30 - 1:30

Sensory Play Techniques with Candice Thompson - 2:00 - 4:00

The Luau will go from 2:00 - 5:00 on Sunday, June 23rd. Please, click here to RSVP. We hope you'll join us in celebrating the homecoming of these children and the Samoan culture!

 

 

 

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Support During Travel

05/20/2013

Angela Simpson, BSW

For all of the different programs that MLJ Adoptions offer all adoptive parents must travel to the country to meet their child. The duration of the stay may be different depending on the country and the added length of the stay may also add stress to the adoptive family. Traveling to another country to meet and/or bring home your child that you are adopting is a defining moment in a family’s life. This is a special time and a highly anticipated event. This event takes place in a foreign land with unfamiliar surroundings and can be both joyous and stressful. That moment that parents hope their child will look at them and love them is often one filled with fear and anxiety. Children who are adopted internationally are taken from everything that they have ever known or loved and that can be a scary time for a child. 

It seems like travel is one of the times in the adoption process where families need support the most. It is important to have someone you are comfortable with who will be a strong positive support for you while you are gone and once you return home. This person may be a spouse, a parent, sibling or a close friend. Consider bringing someone with you if possible so you don’t have to travel alone. Whoever you chose to be your support will need to be a cheerleader for you, support you when your child is not attaching like you’d hoped, help you remember things when you can’t and reassure you of the real reasons why you are adopting and help you to continue to be patient and understanding. One of my roles at MLJ is to provide support for families while they are in country and once they are home and you can email me at angela@mljadoptions.com.
 
One of the hardest parts about traveling is the unknowns and delays. Often parents are given a timeframe that paperwork will be completed within a certain period of time. It is easy for parents to focus on that time and hope for it to be completed sooner rather than later. However, it is important to anticipate delays, be patient and be prepared for the worst because then you might be pleasantly surprised with things turned out better than anticipated. Travel is usually easier if you prepare in advance. Preparation maybe doing things like making a list of things you need, research the area where you’ll be staying, having the child’s room ready, and packing bags before it becomes last minute. It is also important to prepare your children who are already at home. Make sure to pack healthy protein rich snacks because low blood sugar and hunger can increase stress for children and adults.
 
The most important thing to focus your time and energy on is your child. The time in country is a great time to focus on attachment with your child without the distractions of everyday life that you will encounter once you get home. Spend this time getting to know your child and his or her culture and birth country. This may include some sight-seeing but it’s important to try to stick to a normal schedule. Don’t rely on your memory, take notes or journal, take videos and pictures, you’ll appreciate it later. Bring home mementos to include in a Lifebook for your child.
 
Be prepared to carry your child around. One of the best ways to form attachment is to carry your child and give them lots of love and attention. Even if you are adopting a six year old he or she will most likely want to be held. You may consider bringing a wrap or carrier with you. A child may not have been carried around as an infant and will want and ask for that physical attention. It is important to attend to your child’s every needs, don’t discipline and hold them and do as much for them as much as possible. 
 
Wherever you end up staying in-country make yourself at home. If you’re staying at a hotel make it comfortable because you will most likely be there for a while, so unpack. You may also want to find a hotel room with a kitchenette so you can cook and provide nutritional nurturing like you would at home. Other parents who are adopting and in country can also be a support as well. However, we encourage parents to not compare the adoption process. Each and every adoption process is unique and don’t be discouraged if you find out that someone’s process is going faster than yours. 
 
Have the right attitude. If you head into the trip stressed with rigid expectations you will not have an enjoyable time. Enjoy the adventure and time with your child, because after all that is why you’re there, and plan to go-with-the-flow.
 
For more information about MLJ Adoptions' international adoption programs, please click here.

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Photo Of The Week

05/17/2013

Photo used with permission.
If you would like your child to be featured in our Photo Of The Week, please email Shireen@mljadoptions.com. 

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